Monday, 20 February 2012

Ready For The Fall...

It's almost 2 weeks since I last had a T-Shot and so far I am feeling really ropey. I went from feeling exhausted to a state of feeling slightly wired.

I don't feel comfortable in my skin. I feel overly sensitive, I feel that no-one cares about me, and I feel ugly and like a giant whale.  It's like having PMT without tears or a craving for chocolate. I just feel wrong.

It's also a feeling that reminds me of being a teenager all over again, whereby I feel the world isn't fair and that things don't feel right.  But I know this will pass. I am aware that rationally many things aren't bad at all and that I am just feeling sensitive on account of the hormones. 

Which I understand but then feel irritated by it.

I just have to ride it out and in the meantime I have to up my exercise as that will help make me feel more virile, handsome, lean and strong.  Today I have already bought food for my consumption in the day which consists of a lot of fruit and salad. So that is a good first start and a mini detox is always good for the body.

Apart from that I just have to ride this out and think as positively as I can.  Nothing is the end of the world and it's just the bit of the cycle where things can feel a bit delicate.

In other news I have been writing lots, took some photos the other night and have been progressing well on some thoughts and goals for the next few months.  All of that is in hand. I now have to just complete those and lose a stone in weight and all should be well again.

As long as I remind myself that it can happen and that I want it to happen then all shall work out.

One good thing about the surge is it gives me fidgety energy which means tonight a work out might be a good plan as well as find ways to physically exhaust myself when my mind starts to become listless.

It's just the waiting part that feels like forever which is really irritating right now but at the same time it's all part of the process and when on a hormone cycle there are days whereby everything feels wonderful and others where energy levels feel like they are falling at a massive rate.

The more I get used to it the easier it shall become.  Compared to my first couple of shots, these feelings are becoming more familiar which is helping a lot. I know in a few more months I will be not feeling this so acutely as I do the cycle more.

It's just all about being patient, waiting and just letting it all do it's thing.

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